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My Blog SCRIBBLE AND EDIT reflects my love of creative writing, design, literature and film. Check out my Poems & haiku, Romantic Flash Fiction; Blogfest Entries; Blog Awards and other prose and Flash Fiction. Do bear with me, as I will reciprocate with those genuine commenters on my blog.  BTW I sometimes withhold comments for challenges until later. Comments about the post are much appreciated. Thank you.
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Thursday, 19 May 2011

Thursday Tale ~ Smokin'


From Deviant Art  #60

Smokin' by Madeleine Maddocks
The summer sunshine blazed through the opened doorway as Reg stood on the narrow staircase, inhaling deeply. The forbidden cigarette tasted all the sweeter in the relative darkness of this hidden sanctuary. The intoxicating taste masking the earthly smell of damp soil and stone from the surrounding walls, as it enveloped his nostrils and licked curls around his taste buds and throat. He closed his eyes, savouring the moment, sighing.

“Reginald!” came the unmistakable shriek of his 80 year old mother’s crumbling voice.

Reg’s heart pounded beneath his grey gabardine as he stubbed out the cigarette.

“Coming Ma!” he said. (100 words)

16 comments:

  1. That is awesome! I love the idea of flash fiction. So fun.

    ecwrites.com

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  2. I'm full of admiration for one who knows how to get the most from the least! :)

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  3. Lovely!! I wanted the story to continue!! You captured this scene most evocatively! Take care
    x

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  4. Wow! This is wonderful. The deep description in so few words totally absorbs. You have such a gift, Madeleine.

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  5. Awh shucks, thank you
    And I'm not even a smoker ;O)

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  6. Oh, I loved it! A man still afraid of Mama - brill.

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  7. Great flash fiction!

    And now I want to know will happen next to Reginald . . .

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  8. Madeleine, you won a free copy of Cindy Borgne's Vallar at my blog today! It turned out that she put the book on sale today, and she posted instructions on her blog on how to get Vallar free from Smashwords. I hope you don't feel cheated, but congratulations anyway!

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  9. Great advice on how to write Flash Fiction, Madeleine.

    A terrific bit of description. All the senses represented. A piece well written with a surprise ending. Who can ask for anything more?

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  10. Great piece - so much said with so few words!

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  11. Award time!
    http://thefarseas.blogspot.com/2011/05/some-awards.html

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  12. I always look forward to reading your entries, Madeleine. They are so beautiful, like small works of art.

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  13. Love how you experiment with different form.

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  14. That was great, Madeleine :). A smokin piece of fiction ;)

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  15. just loved it. :)

    mommy's lil boy.

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  16. Wow. I love how you did a complete 180 with the final couple of lines. Hot fiction!

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